Saturday, October 3, 2009

Time Squander


Adventure Girl came over last night for vintage wine-in-a-cardboard box and deep conversation. We were excitedly sharing stories about things that had us enthused about life these days. She was recounting a meeting she had with a seemingly ordinary young woman who is setting extraordinary goals to affect change - and is doing it. We commented on how there are remarkable people who seem to spend every minute of their time productively, and we feel a little shameful for squandering precious time. I shared my disappointment in myself that I have yet to latch onto a cause or initiative to which  I feel compelled to make a commitment. As it stands now, I am just one of those people who writes cheques to and follows causes that inspire me. That is easy giving. I haven't figured out the best way I can make meaningful contributions.

When I was a young, working mother of three, barely holding it together to get through what seemed to be whirlwind, activity packed, energy sucking days, I flamed a desire to give back. I remembered my college days of volunteering with mentally challenged kids and adults in a group home, and that fulfillment that was a gift to me. I yearned to recreate that experience and achieve that fulfillment once again. But simply put - I didn't have anything left to offer - nor did I have the energy.

Now I am on the cusp of being an empty nester - Kidlet will be heading off to school next fall - and that yearning to volunteer is stronger than ever. And that is because my time has come. No more squandering for me. I can feel the pieces coming together, and my destiny taking shape and becoming clearer.

I have alot to give back, and I don't want to waste a minute!

2 comments:

  1. Thought provoking... sounds like a great way to fill the hole in that upcoming empty nest! I'm also one of those that tends to go the "easy giving" route, but I figure it's better than doing just nothing at this stage, and can be fulfilling in a different way. I am always blown away with admiration for those remarkable persons who don't tolerate time squandering! Looking forward to hearing more about your adopted "sister" too!

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  2. Very thought-provoking. Do you also find that that more you HAVE to get done, the easier it is to get more done? The imperative of that packed schedule is (for me, anyway) the perfect motivator.

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