March On

It is inconceivable to me that there are but moments left in February. It is a short month to begin with  - however the days and weeks are but a blur; a blur of flurries, snow storms, rain, and melts. A month of frigid winter laced with temperate spring like weather. And now it is almost behind me. Time is gaining momentum with every year, and the winters that used to seem endless now are over barely before I can get acclimatized.

But I admit I will be embracing March head on, full body squeeze and a pinch in the cheek. For me, March signals good things on the way - S P R I N G!

So s'long February. Thanks for the snow day and a couple of truly spectacular, magical winterscapes. I could have done without the freezing rain and white knuckle commutes but we can put that behind us now. At the risk of being pushy and rude, I am happy to hold the door open for you and see you off - and resist a gentle kick in the behind to help you on your way. It was a slice.

March on!

Wonderland

There were about four inches of sparkles on the car when we came out of the movie -- the best kind of snow -- the kind that looks bedazzled with diamonds when the moonlight catches it. The world somehow seems hushed on a night like this, insulated by the thick blanket of snow. It makes me happy though. Even the act of sweeping off the car and scraping the ice from the windshield brings me joy. It's the best part of winter although my heart goes out to those who have to shovel it.

Hubby and I hadn't been to the movies in ages so we finally went to see The King's Speech. It didn't disappoint. The car slipped and slided along the unploughed roads; a winter wonderland. I drew a big happy face on hubby's buried car hibernating in the driveway. I added a big heart before I drew in one more gaze at the glistening diamond dusting before heading indoors.

It always comes down to the milliseconds of wonder at the simple things that deliver the happy. And for that I am truly grateful - and happy.

Howling Winds

The wind howled through last night with a vengeance so fierce it woke me up from a deep sleep and an idyllic Kenyan dream. I laid in bed snuggled with the comforter pulled over my face listening to the symphonic frenzy and wondering if the gigantic evergreen tree on our front lawn may topple onto the cars or our roof. I resisted the urge to leave my cosy cocoon to sneak a peek out the window.

Yesterday our mid winter was abruptly interrupted by unseasonal soaring temperatures of 10 degrees Celsius. It was like a perfect spring day with blue skies, brilliant sunshine and little streams of melting snow trickling down the sidewalks and roads. Spring out of nowhere! And then as fast as it arrived, it was gone in a flash - a fleeting opener for the windstorm.

Isn't that just like life? We expect the seasons of our life to be predictable and linear and then out of nowhere - a flash flood in winter or a random blizzard in springtime. Someone passes before we expect or who we deem to be too young; someone who is wealthy suddenly loses everything; an apparently perfect family breaks apart. Life serves up surprises that are out of our control and additionally, we detonate our own explosives by the choices we make.  Over time we learn it is moot to ask "why?" and settle on "why not?'. We channel our shock and awe to "how" ... how can I respond in a way that is productive? Experience teaches us that life is anything but linear, seasonal, or predictable, and to expect the unexpected. Change is not only inevitable - it is a certainty.

Note to self: So when the winds of change howl through the hallowed halls of your life, be brave enough to pull the covers down off your face, leave the comforts of your cocoon and take a peek out the window. Better yet, get out and face it head on. Sometimes it isn't as scary as it sounds.

She's Back

She burst through the door with a toothy grin wider than her face and promptly dropped her bags. "I'm home". Sound the trumpets; Kidlet is home from school for reading week, although I doubt I will actually catch her "reading". I was on my day off so we had a little time to catch up before I left to do groceries. Unless it is before noon, she always has alot to say. Apple doesn't fall far from the tree. She held the dog up to her face, flashed her pearly whites and urged me to "take the pic" for my blog. She added that my blog has been stale lately without any Kidlet posts. So here you go Kidlet! Fridge is full, the front hall is cluttered with extra shoes and bags and I'll have to maneuver around the extra vehicle in the driveway. But you were right about something Kidlet - life is a little spicier when you are around. Not sure about my blog though.

Peculiarly Circular

Life is peculiarly circular.

When we are born, we emerge from loins of pain, and similarly, when we exit we leave a labyrinth of pain for our loved ones to navigate.
We welcome triumphantly the birth of a new life, and we celebrate the life that has been lived, but is no more.

Tears, pain, and love in doses we can barely handle - at either end. Funny, similar, familiar feelings at polar opposite ends of the life spectrum.

Life is so peculiarly circular.

Say it!

These three words are so simple but oh so very powerful. They can warm a heart, make a day, trigger a smile, light up a face, and bind you for life. We probably don't say the words as often as we think them but the impact they leave is more permanent than the sand they may be written in.

My wish today is that you all have someone to say I love you to  --- or someone to hear those words from. Say it aloud, and often. It's good for the soul and people gotta know! 

Love, Lyn xx oo

Sprouts

I have learned that the realization of any dream starts with the germination of thought. You have plant the seed of possibility without worry about how it will come to be. First and foremost you have to put it out there. So...

I have a new dream percolating ... a lofty one that seems like a long shot. India 2012. That's right ... another Free the Children trip to another wonderfully mystical place on the planet. I need to have a vision in my scope; something audacious to exercise my power of possibility.

So there -- it's done! The seed has been planted and now I just have to wait for the dream to sprout. Stay tuned.

Birthday Kiss

Please - no tongues!

You are nineteen today so officially, a Kidlet no more. I suppose you are happy about that, and eager to finally be a grown up. But then again, you always were an old soul. When you were an infant I spent hours gazing into those chocolate pudding eyes as I held you in my arms, sharing tales of my day and the dreams of my life, knowing that my secrets were safe with you.

You made us laugh with your permanent grin and mischievous ways; how you squealed "running!" when I told you we were going to the library. And run you did - up and down every aisle, diving through empty shelves giggling as I gave chase, shushing you and dodging dirty looks.

You were determined not to need me ... except when you got sick. Otherwise, you burst boldly forward, doing it yourself, on your own. I can do it all by myself. 

You have taught me much my dear Kidlet. You reminded me that sometimes the best help we can offer our kids is trust in that they will choose wisely. You have given me more joy than anyone deserves .... or maybe the joy that I wish everyone could have. We have shared dreams and lived them and in spite of my motherly reminders of what a slob you are, being your Mama has been my most important and rewarding accomplishment ever.

Today as you topple into full on adulthood, I send you this birthday kiss ... and wishes that you continue to create the beautiful life you want to live. And I wish you love.

-- Mama

Birthday kisses also to my far away sister and godson who both have birthdays today. Muah!

Triggers and Lessons

Your song was playing when I turned on my car radio... the husky crooning of Louis Armstrong singing "and I said to myself, what a wonderful world". I smiled and thought of you. These gentle triggers come at times I need them most. I thought about how many times in a day I start a sentence with "my mom always told/taught me ...".

Your life lessons, delivered so casually, were profound. You were ahead of your time. Who talked about the mind, body, spirit connection in the early seventies - or the power of visualization? When I felt worried you would tell me close my eyes and make a mental list of everything that was upsetting me, and then picture myself loading  the "problems" into a trunk, locking it up, and then dropping it from a plane into the sea. If it's out of your control, let it go. Funny enough, I always felt lighter and relieved afterwards.

When I would lose something, you would tell me to go lie on my bed, close my eyes, breath slowly and deeply, the whole time affirming that "I know I will find [lost item -- usually my library books]. I know the answer will come to me".  It was like magic! I would inevitably get an image of where to find that which was misplaced. I felt powerful and confident.

You taught us to "accept" that which we needed --"I accept all the creativity and inspiration I need to complete this project" - as opposed to begging for it. You explained that all that we need already exists and is there for the accepting -- knowledge, wisdom, strength, courage, and creativity. It was a matter of learning to access it.

You taught us well Mom and I am still learning. You reminded us always that life is an exciting adventure and not to sweat the small stuff. Best of all you taught me to create the life I want to live and to trust that life is unfolding as it should. And you know what? I think I have, and I know it is!