Gift

Today I received a wonderful gift: a letter from one of my Women for Women sisters. I tore open the envelope with the familiar letterhead and was delighted to find a handwritten letter with a translation attached. The crinkled page was dated March 28, 2012! It took so long to reach me from the Congo, that in the mean time, my sister graduated from the program and a new sister has been assigned to me.

I consumed every word, picturing her, pen in hand, reaching across the world to a sponsor unknown to her. I recognised "rafiki" -- friend. Although brief, the letter brought the struggles of the   people of the Congo to life -- especially the mothers caring for their families. She is only 28, yet has four children with ages ranging from 16 to 10. She was a child having children.

"I am a bit fine, but I do not know what the future holds for me."

She closed with "may God bless you".

So tonight, where ever you lay your head Rehema, I hope you are safe, and that God watches over you and your young family.

How can I feel anything but gratitude for the blessings and abundance in my life.

Crisis

Well it arrived with little warning - the first wintry blustery day of the year - just in time for my day off. I thought I would break with tradition and start my Christmas shopping in November. And as I braved the mall that was fully decked out in seasonal glitter, humming along with tried and true Christmas favourites I couldn't help thinking about an email I had received about my Women for Women sister I sponsor.

Claudine lives in the Congo and if you have heard the news lately, there is a serious outbreak of violence that is teetering on civil war.

It's surreal... While I was wandering around a Mecca of commercialism deciding what gifts to buy my kids, my WFW sister on the other side of the world is trying desperately to stay alive and protect her children. Her country is known as the Rape Capital of the world and sexual violence against women is rampant. In short - she is living a nightmare. Is she surviving? I can only imagine what she thinks about in the darkness of night. 

And so I will suspend my concern for my "first world problems" and be grateful for the bountiful life I lead; for the warmth and safety of my home; and for the love and support of my loved ones. This precious season of giving and peace is the perfect time to pray for those who do not have even  the most basics of life - food, water, shelter and safety - and are deprived of human rights and dignity. Women for Women International works to help women affected by war to become self sustaining by matching them with women sponsors. WFW has had to suspend the program while the violence has escalated but will resume the programs as soon as it is safe for their staff and clients.

Tonight, in the darkness of night, my thoughts and heart will rest with Claudine, my Congolese sister.

Ruined

Photo from Obsidian Theatre Company

Ruined. Maybe it was a little ominous sounding for a festive night out with Adventure Girl to celebrate Tender Heart's  birthday. But needless to say we happily traipsed into Toronto to see  Obsidian Theatre's production of Ruined. I had been anticipating seeing this play for almost a year but I wasn't sure how much my gal pals knew about the subject of the story. A few hours before we were scheduled to meet, I cut and pasted some information about fistula and the Panzi Hospital into an email and sent it off to them.

The play is set in a humble shack of a bar in a small mining town in the Congo. Women rule the stage in this production and from the first moment the lights dropped and the drumming began, my heart pounded just a little quicker. From our second row seats in the intimate theatre we sat - eyes transfixed on the mosaic, textures and shades of fierce femininity that unfolded  - mesmerized by the slow, deliberate reveal. There were moments of shock and awe - mentions of  ways in which women have been, and are violated - so horrific that the air is sucked from your lungs when you heard the words. The pit of anxiety that is formed from the first appearance of the shunned, shattered girls in tattered rags continues to swell with each layer of conflict and hopelessness. We learn what "ruined" means ... and how these violent crimes and acts of war raged upon women's bodies are intended to break the spirit and destroy the very fabric of the family and community.

As I watched, the whole while trying to contain the waterworks, my mind drifted to my Sudan sister from Women for Women International and to the horrors she has experienced. Hurts felt by our sisters are felt by all women. There is a kindred thread that binds us together.Ruined is a story of the phoenix rising from ashes with a display of unfailing human resilience that is blinding. Or maybe it was those tears ....

Here and There

First walk in the snow of the season. Armed with plastic bags in my pockets for pick up duty, my breath steamed in the air as I ran the pathway with Fritz. My mind wandered to far off places as we left a trail of foot and paw prints in the snow. The southern Sudan has a monumental referendum vote on Sunday that could potentially erupt into violence and even a full blown conflict. Innocent people could be killed.

So today on my leisurely day off, with my biggest worry being whether or not  I brought along enough "doggie doo" bags, my heart and soul is with the men, women and children in the Sudan who will be fighting for their independence, and perhaps, their very lives.

In the cold wintry forest, with the sun sitting low in the stark trees, I whispered a silent prayer for peace.

Lifting of the Veil

Maybe it's because I am the mother of three girls, or that I have sisters; or that I am a "girl" myself. Maybe it's my deepened love for humanity, our global family. Whatever the reason, I had a heck of a time getting through the introduction of "Half the Sky" by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn. A knot in my stomach tightened with every statistic, words evaporated under a watery blur with each horrific example cited, and I am shakened to my very core.

I bought the book ages ago and true to my habit I immediately thumbed through the pages, devouring random snippets from the beginning, middle and last few pages. But my full attention to this read was on hold until I could finish the other three books I had in progress.  another habit of mine

Women hold up half the sky.     Chinese Proverb

Like a delectable dessert, Half the Sky sat in waiting for a time in which I could completely digest each juicy morsel. That time finally arrived. The statistics are astounding, unfathomable. The book is a testament to the global "gender-cide" against women in developing countries and the marginalization of women on our own continent and society: sex trafficking, rape as a weapon of war, abortion of female fetuses, violence, oppression, slavery and discrimination.

My hero Stephen Lewis has been bellowing this message for years now, heart outstretched, passion erupting from every podium, microphone and interview he has addressed. He has made it his life's work to not only get the word out about that which he knows to be true, and what he has personally witnessed, but also to get funds to the grassroots groups championing the causes, that lives may be saved and quality of life restored.

For the past few years I have had the time and clarity of purpose to explore and learn more about the challenges that face humanity. I involved myself and my chequebook in causes that I deemed to be important however I struggled to weave the threads into a cohesive mission for myself. I think I am on to something now ... the veil is lifting and I have a feeling it's going to be a girl thing.

More Women for Women

I just got word that my Women for Women sister Monica will be graduating from the program at the end of October. It is hard to fathom that a year has passed already since that first glimpse of her in the black and white picture sent in the WFW sponsorship kit. I can remember thinking that her stare was that of someone who harboured alot of pain and her face bore evidence of hard living.

Monica is from the Sudan - mother of seven children at age 23. I wrote her many letters as recommended and although we are cautioned that the women may not be able to reciprocate, I had hoped to hear from her -- how her life was going. No matter. It is my deepest hope that the year spent being loved by a far away sister and supported by Women for Women has given her stable legs and renewed strength to go forward with her life. I have to write her a final letter that will serve as our goodbye -- and then -- I can look forward to learning about my new sister.

Women have been supporting one another forever as long as I can remember. My mom once likened her "coffee dates" with the neighbourhood ladies to a support group. I would hear snippets of their conversations as they stirred their instant coffee as I wandered through the kitchen - invisible. Brainstorming ideas -- how to afford night school; who could babysit the kids; birth control issues; how to meet the demands of husbands and kids. They would clean one another's houses, watch each other's children and pool together to sew curtains and paint bedrooms. Women supporting other women -- and that is what I love about WFW.

I just hope Monica has someone who loves her enough to wrap their arms around her weary shoulders and tell her that they love her. I hope Monica can feel the love and power of half of the planet's population pulling for her-- yearning for her survival and sur-thrival.

Stay tuned for future introductions to my new sister ....

My other posts about Women for Women

Notes from the Field

As I have mentioned before I am involved with the Women for Women International program as a sponsor. What started as mild interest in this organization has grown into full blown admiration and respect for the work they do.  And in the true spirit of blogging, I have been following their field blog to gain insights and a feel for the situations facing women in countries of conflict. I just have to share it with you: Notes from the Field.

As I scan the vivid images and read the personal, accounts and impressions from the field officers from Rwanda, the Congo and other places, my curiosity is roused and the desire to learn more is stoked. I think about my WFW sister Monica from the Sudan and I try to picture her sitting in one of the programs offered by WFW. I wonder how she is managing and what her worries are. Does she know that people care about her and the many others who have survived the effects of brutal conflict?  My next big adventure I think will be to Rwanda; I have much to learn and I want to do it first hand, up close and personal. I have to experience it for myself.

But for now, Notes from the Field will have to suffice. And aren't we fortunate to have access and insight that we wouldn't otherwise have - the power and the gifts of blogs. I honestly think they can help affect change in this world.

Take 61 seconds and become inspired and moved; watch this video:



See my other posts about Women for Women International and my far away sister Monica.

Dropping Monica a Line

I finally wrote my first letter to my Sudanese sister from Women for Women International. It was hard to know what to include ... but I decided a heartfelt introduction was in order. Here is a little of what I wrote:

Dear Monica,
I have waited for this chance to write to you for a long time. From the moment that I learned about the need and struggles of my fellow women and the work that Women to Women was doing, I wanted to be a part of it. As women we share a common bond of sisterhood. We are caregivers; we have people we love and nurture and have to be the strength that our children, husbands/spouses and parents turn to when they need support.

It was wonderful to finally see you my sister – your noble face staring back at me. Your eyes look so sad Monica but you look like a strong woman. I wish I could sit with you and share a cup of tea; you could tell me about your life, your family. You could share your pain and tell me what makes you happy. I could wrap my arms around you and hug you close so you would know that you are have a sister on your side. I would tell you that I am a mother of three daughters ... and  am a wife, daughter, sister, aunt, friend. I would tell you so much ... but I would listen more...

I want to know all about you Monica ... maybe you can write back. But if you can’t, I want you to know that someone very far away thinks about you and is sending you lots of love. I know it is difficult to take care of children and make a life for yourself but I can see the fire in your eyes and I know that if you make a picture of the life you want, you can have it. Life will get better. Believe.

Love  – your far away sister.

Introducing .. My Sudan Sister

Last fall I applied to Women for Women International to sponsor a sister - a survivor  of war. My application coincided with an appearance by WFW founder Zainab Salbi on Oprah. Surprise, surprise - her appearance generated huge interest and created an increased level of sponsorship activity  I can only imagine. They contacted me to let me know that they had a huge backlog of applications and donations but that I would soon be connected with a sister.

Today was that day. I ripped open the large white envelope bearing the now familiar Women For Woman logo, so excited to put a face to the name that had been provided to me. I opened the folder and there was Monica, a twenty-three year old who lives in the Sudan where she cares for seven children. It's difficult to get too much from one picture, but the eyes don't lie. Monica stares back from dull, haunted eyes, with a posture that can't disguise fatigue and despair.

With the sponsorship she will join a circle of 25 women her support network and have a year to take intensive, life changing training that will help her gain control over her life.

The enclosed letter was generous in its gratitude: "You are the reason for this transformation Lynda. Your sister was only able to enter the Women for Women International program because you reached out to her."

Hardly. Monica is reaching out to me and over this year, we will learn alot about one another and I will learn about the struggles women face in the most desperate conditions. I will do this from the security of my home - my safe haven. She may not be so lucky. And I know that once again, I will get back more than I give. Perhaps Monica and I will resurrect hope and both undergo a transformation of the humankind, sister to sister.

Read my other posts about Women for Women International:
Global Family
Women for Women ... a Sisterhood

Global Family

Yesterday when I got home from work I had not one - but two wonderful surprises waiting for me. I finally got word that I have been matched with a sister in the Women for Women sponsorship program. I applied over a month ago and have been anxiously waiting to get started. My application coincided with an appearance of the founder on Oprah - which translated into a huge interest in the program. I still haven't received the particulars but I feel good knowing that things are progressing.

The icing on the cake was the letter I received from the family of my new sponsored child, Genesis,  from Plan. The letter was written in Spanish and enclosed in an envelope they had crafted from a sheet of paper, bound with masking tape. Along with the rumpled photo of a cherub faced, dark eyed toddler, they enclosed a small white crocheted hat with Honduras etched in red pencil. They wrote that they hope I will think of them every time I look at it. I knew instantly that it would have a place on my Christmas tree this year ... and I will think of them.

It is no coincidence that I received these two reminders on the same day ... they were gentle nudges from the universe reminding me that there is great need in the world and that it takes so little to share, to make a big impact. It's true what they say about giving ... you get back more than you give.

You may be interested in my previous posts:

• about my Plan sponsorship
• about my Women for Women sponsorship

Women for Women ... a Sisterhood

It was overdue and today, I finally did it. I got me another sister!  After following Women for Women International for months now on Facebook, and reading the field blog, today I finally took action and signed up to sponsor a woman. Women for Women International helps women in war-torn regions  rebuild their lives by providing  financial and emotional aid, job-skills training, rights education and small business assistance.

When you go to the website and learn about the residual damage  and suffering that war causes and the hardships of the women who survive, you may find your throat tightening, and your eyes welling up. I dare you to watch a 5 minute video showing the horrific atrocities and burdens our sisters around the world shoulder - and not weep.  It is both overwhelming and inspiring. It reminded me of the bounty and abundance I have in my own life and I wanted to reach out and not only ease the pain of these resilient, strong women, but also connect with them. I have something to share, and even more to learn.

I should receive my packet from WFW any day and then I will know the face of the "sister" I am sponsoring. I can't wait to start. I have sisters and daughters and the opportunity to support women in need speaks to me.

This was the perfect way to bring light to this dreary, rainy, damp day. I am excited but more importantly, it has me thinking about what else I could do - what other changes I could make to have a positive impact on humankind and the planet.

Stay tuned and I'll introduce you to her when I meet her myself.