To Life!

It's Easter Sunday. So much to celebrate! And I'm not just talking about the Cadbury bunny that is missing some essential body parts. The dust has died down after the Easter famjam; the leftover leftovers are nestled on the second shelf in the fridge, the folding chairs are folded and stored, far away family members are back home and my heart is as full as my belly. 

Me and the Sibs. Photo courtesy of LRC

It was a special weekend. Our family of twenty filled the house with raucous chatter, laughter and dancing.  Me and the sibs got down with Uptown Funk much to the horror of our kids. Or maybe it was the bunny ears... they really have to learn to loosen up.

We gathered for a family picture before dinner... kinda like herding cats. Just as hubby counted the shot down - a unison of "we're getting married" rang out. There was a clear second of silence before the ensuing chorus shrieks and screams. My eldest daughter is going to marry her soulmate. Another family first - a same sex wedding. The family swarmed the couple and cocooned them with good wishes and all the love they could muster. 

We live for these monumental moments! And it is not lost on our how special it is for us all to be able to share them together. I couldn't help thinking about how proud and pleased my mom would be for her namesake. 

We wrapped the weekend with an impromptu dinner with hubby's mom and dad. We missed them and got our fix. We drove home satisfied and contented with the world.

And so it was. Another life affirming, family centric weekend. And if I could raise my glass, I would toast - to life! It is indeed good.

It's a Date!

Well, it's legit; on; set in soapstone. My daughter's engagement has materialized into a wedding date. Now the fun begins. I have been watching reruns of "Say Yes to the Dress" so I will know how to scrunch my face disapprovingly and effectively impose my opinion as my daughter models wedding gown hopefuls. NOT! I only have ten months to excavate embarassing details from her childhood, polish the speech, fine tune my dance moves the slosh, chicken dance, the hustle -  lose a few hips, transform into a viable monster-in-law and perfect the art of meddling.

All joking aside, there is something exciting about having a date attached to what will surely be the ultimate famjam. I was chatting away with my daughter about the endless possibilities when her phone went dead. I still had so much yet to cover. Come to think about it, that's been happening alot lately. I think I am going to have to reign in my enthusiasm a little and pace myself. I don't want to overwhelm her too early or she may make like a turtle and our collaboration will be shortlived. 

I can picture her now: a delicate little bride standing hand in hand with her beloved, and me, waterworks and mascara running down my face, digital camera in hand and king-sized Kleenex wrapped neatly around my schnozz as I howl witness her nuptials. But in the meantime, I will be on my very best behaviour; a portrait of grace and dignity as I resist the urge to interfere, dominate and micro manage. This is Harmony's time and really, all I can do is wish her and her beloved a life together that will see their love grow stronger and expand through the years, just as mine has for them.

Love Again

Yesterday my dad and step-mom celebrated their tenth anniversary. A decade of togetherness and marital bliss. And no, I am not being sarcastic. When you happen to find that person who fits, who complements you and with whom you are better together than alone - it is bliss.

My dad was married to my mother for 38 years and she often commented that he was someone who needed a partner with whom he could share his life with. Experiencing life alone has never been enough for him -- it was the sharing of his adventures that has always been paramount. My parents had a passionate relationship; they were fearless in their pursuit of their dreams; they fought hard and they loved harder. When my mother passed my sibs and I worried that my father would be aimless without a partner. We thought he would return to the far North and immerse himself in his work and we'd never see him again.

But that didn't happen. Serendipity intervened and through people dad knew in the North, he reconnected with a lady he had know decades earlier in university. They bonded over shared memories and over the course of many long distance phone calls, they developed a relationship worthy of pursuit.

It was a life affirming tonic. The light returned to my father's eyes; his interest in everything returned with a zeal and he was goofy in love. It was a riot to watch my grown father so smitten and fretting over the perfect Valentine's Day gift. This happened fairly soon after my mother's passing and the usual questions edged in ... was it  too soon? What would he be waiting for?  Is he still grieving? No telling how long that could take ... and who says you can't be moving forward while grieving?

I read somewhere that if people who have had a positive marital experience are happy to repeat it, and remarry. Those who haven't - don't. So ready or not, we welcomed another addition to our clan. Mama T - and it has been heartwarming to witness the bond they have formed. She gets him. And I really wasn't sure he would find someone at that point in his life who would.

And ten years later, I can see that she still puts a twinkle in his eye and his love for her is written all over his face. They love one another and they live their lives to the fullest. And isn't it comforting to know that we can love again - and that there isn't necessarily just one love out there for us? Each love is it own independent, special package of oneness, all unto itself. In this case it was a love for a season -- a season of renewal.

Thank you for showing us that life can be better as a pair - and that love can happen, at any age.

Grow Old and Stay in Love ...

Tonight Hubby and I ate our dinner in the family room, perched in front of the ginormous TV. For temporary relief from the relentless Michael Jackson coverage I turned to the Biography channel. They were featuring Kirk and Michael Douglas. As the film was winding down it showed a clip from Kirk Douglas' 50th wedding anniversary party. He and his wife had renewed their vows in an outdoor ceremony. As he saw his wife, walking shakily by herself down a grassy aisle, Kirk threw away his cane and went running to meet her - arms outstretched. If that wasn't enough to bring a tear to a glass eye -- the icing on the cake was when Kirk reached out to her and in his thick, raspy voice - started singing a song he had especially written for the event, called Please Stay in Love with Me.

Pass the Kleenex please. Hubby chuckled away at me but I gotta tell you -- it was the most romantic moment I had ever witnessed. Isn't that a secret desire of all us who are in love -- that we will stay in crazy love forever? I hope in 30 or 40 years I have Hubby chasing me down to declare his undying love and maybe hum me a tune or two. That was the gem in today -- an inspirational goal to aspire to ...

A woman knows the man she wants to marry
and a man knows the woman he
doesn't want to be without.
- Kirk Douglas

Love and Longevity

Today my mom-in-law (heart) and father-in-law have been married forty years. They got off to an early start, which means they seem far too young to have that number of years together. It got me thinking about relationships that last lifetimes. Some endure and mature' some flourish; some continuously evolve and some simply survive.

My parents were married to one another until my mother's passing. They too were married at an early age; they built a family and a life starting with nothing and with only one another to depend on. Like my beloved in-laws they overcame countless challenges by meeting them head on - together - as a team. I am always awestruck by couples who manage to keep the sacred oath, and no matter what life throws their way, they keep their love alive.

It doesn't take alot of effort to stay married for a lifetime - in fact - it just requires the passing of time. It does however take alot of effort to have a marriage thrive for a lifetime. A marriage with longevity is truly wonderful; and a marriage built on a foundation of love, and love expressed is a gift and an inspiration.

So congratulations to MIH and father-in-law on forty years of marriage; and I wish them many more. And here's to those who live in love. Love and longevity -- what a pairing!