Reminder

She got mail! My mom has been gone for almost fourteen years now impossible! and today, she got mail. I couldn't help but smile when I saw the envelope laying on the kitchen table, with her name on it.

Just in case I had any notion of letting her memory lapse, she gave me a gentle nudge, just as she has done so many times before.

Mom, we speak your name every day; the advice you so intuitively dispensed is passed along generously to those who need it most; and your handwritten notes flutter out from nowhere to remind me of your loving spirit.

Thank you ... you always seem to know when I need you most. 

Exposure and Closure

It takes on an unwelcoming cloak in the gray drear of the October cold. This beloved cottage of ours is a summer paradise; a slice of heavenly nature. But with nothing but uninsulated plywood flooring between my woollies and the great outdoors, the chill in the air is unrelenting.

Hubby and I went north to close up the cottage and ready it for winter hibernation. It just so happened that we picked probably the most inhospitable day possible for the task. It was 6 degrees Celsius with wind warnings and worst of all - it poured rain the entire time.

My electric heaters raised the temp a few more degrees to 12 so I couldn't see my breath (thankfully) but the toilet seat felt as though it was a block of ice. Hubby had it far worse pulling water lines out of the lake, lugging the dock furniture up the steep incline to store under the cottage and disengaging the floating docks in preparation for the ice and snow that is sure to follow in the months coming. He was drenched to the skin and the love affair I was having with my rubber boots came to an abrupt end when they cracked and flooded with lake water.

It was so miserable that it was comical and hubby and I giggled uncontrollably as I attempted to lift my corner of the waterlogged dock. I was more of a hindrance in my clumsy as I struggled to keep my balance in my unfashionable but beloved boots on the slippery rocks. Hubby ruled with his Herculean display of strength and endurance and I saluted him on bended knee as I tried to get up from my latest slip.

The beds were stripped and wrapped in plastic; the fridge emptied; the water lines drained; the deck furniture and canoe stored safely under the cottage and the electricity shut off for the winter. Everything packed up with another year's of precious memories from a summer loved at the cottage.

It was bittersweet pulling away; the half naked woods left the cottage looking forlorn and exposed and me with a feeling of sadness in my heart. But the yearning for a hot shower to warm my aching chilled limbs made it a little easier to leave and tune my channel to gratitude for the gifts that have been bestowed. For all that and more, I am supremely grateful.

The mountain of cottage laundry!

Travelling Girl

I love Canada! I boarded my baby plane (thankfully had a bathroom but no sink ... alcohol based sanitizer if you were wondering) and headed east for work. The colours were magnificent and because we were flying in a plane that travels close to the ground, I got a bird's eye view of the spectacular foliage in eastern Canada. I have been in every province and territory in Canada with the exception of the Yukon (am saving that one for Harmony) and I have never lost my awe for the rugged beauty of this wondrous land.  I get giddy as soon as I hit the airport cause that means I am going somewhere! Today was no exception.

I people-watched intently as I waited for my flight and pretended not to eavesdrop as I witnessed the unraveling, converging and unfolding of lives. Intriguing. Technology ruled the departure lounge of course but I couldn't help noticing the elderly couple across from me - her with her Kindle and he with his tablet and me with my stealth little camera.

The cab ride was a treat. In the 15 minute chat I learned more about the local woes, best spots to check out and the pride my driver has for his community. Cab rides are like that ... wisdom imparted to a visiting guest that seems to set the tone for the duration. I arrived an hour before sunset so I had time to troll the streets and get the lay of the land ... the nearest Cora's for breakfast; a handy little noodle hut and the venue where I will be working. In the offchance you are interested, I shared some pics of this quaint autumnal town and resisted the urge to  photograph food. Did I tell you how much I love my beautiful grand country?

Thanksgiving Pixels

It was the warmest, sunniest Thanksgiving I could remember. No typical sweater weather here, in fact thoughts of air conditioning danced in my head. Having the oven on all day added to the tropical feel inside but I still lit my pumpkin candles.

There were people missing at the table .. a few of my sibs and kids and for the first time ever, my dad and step-mom. And despite the absences, there were no empty seats at the table. We had grandparents that don't usually come and of course we had our beloved Doris who at 94 makes us all look old for our age.

It's all about traditions: the same turnips get cooked even though only half of us like them; the stuffing is made exactly the same way; flour in the homemade gravy; homemade cranberries, turkey of course; the fall fair; and most importantly, time with our family.

Since a picture tells a thousand words, get ready for a few "grand" visuals of our Canadian Thanksgiving weekend:

Mile high brownie pie

Gluten-free apple cranberry cake

Oh the pies we could make!

Greedy little pigs!

Hanibal Lecter sheep

My kind of race.

Simply Perfect

It's been one of those days that I will file under "simply perfect". Mother Nature so generously bestowed some beautiful autumn weather, with warm brilliant sunshine haloing the gold and yellow leaves. I shut the furnace off and threw open the windows to let the fresh air blow through the house. I cleaned my fridge, made a call to update my dad on the election results, gloated over the Liberal victory with him and then dashed off to do my grocery shopping with my eldest girl.

I was feeling the abundance so I said "yes" to everyone who was collecting. I baked pumpkin tarts, made a brownie mile high cake and peeled everything that needed the outer layer removed. I stopped short of my neck. I filled vases with rustic bouquets and lit pumpkin spice votives and resisted the urge to eat them. Tomorrow we are having the family over for Thanksgiving dinner and I am almost ready. Tomorrow I will dust off the vacuum, declutter (dump everything into a laundry basket) the top of every flat service in the kitchen, make stuffing, and set the table. Hubby will coax the innards out of the turkey and work his magic on the 20 lb bird. My stomach just growled. I'm getting hungry.

I think I may have ingested half my daily calories in cake batter. I got to lick the spatulas AND the bowls ... and now you know what made this day simply perfect!  To my fellow Canadians celebrating Thanksgiving, I wish you a wonderful weekend and hope that you have someone you love to share the wishbone with.

Ninety-nine

You turned 99 today; a milestone of monumental proportion. We thought you wouldn't understand or remember, but when your daughter showed up bearing joy and birthday greetings, you spoke up loud and clear, "My birthday is in October". And you were right. You are so full of surprises, riding a roller coaster of oblivion, despair, recognition and momentary clarity. Much of your time is spent inward in a world of your own design.

You are loved, and tenderly attended to by your devoted daughter. You know you have a daughter Shirley, even though you are unable to attach that knowledge to her face. She squeezes you tightly and tells you that she loves you. You whisper "I love you too". You sit slightly slouched, eyes tightly closed until she coaxes you back. You don't see the tears escaping, rolling down her cheeks. She is quick to erase their traces; fighting to keep the mood light and happy, to create a world to keep your interest.

But you are disappearing swiftly Nana. The spots of joy are fewer and farther between. Life is not offering you the comfort you need, and the disease is stealing more of you each day. It's painful for your loved ones  to witness your decline, to release that over which we have no control.

But today is your birthday, and you had cake. And for a few moments,  there was sweetness in your world. You didn't need words, you could taste it. You didn't need to know her name, you felt her. And at ninety-nine years of age, sweetness and love may be all we can give you.

Happy birthday Nana.

Weekend Brief

The little numbers in the corner of my laptop tell me that it is October 2nd. Hard for me to believe ... September seemed to slip through my fingers and now we are into October. With my calendar already blotched with appointments and commitments I can see that this month too will fly by; be over before I know it.

There have been reminders of the new season being ushered in. The trees are in various states of undress and colour and this weekend was cold (6 degrees Celsius) and rainy. If I were a bear I would be heading for my cave to hibernate. Instead I crawled the mall (purposefully), went to a movie with hubby, did the laundry, got reacquainted with my iron, baked a cake, made potato leek soup, and started (but didn't come close to finishing) reorganizing our basement and spare room (AKA my personal space). Have you ever over-zealously tackled a reorganizing project, gotten sidetracked by reading every greeting card,  pouring over old photos and ended with a pile in middle of the floor harder on the eyes than the original travesty - just as you run out of steam. Get the picture? There is lots more to do know but I admit that I enjoyed the leisurely reminiscing. I just have to get better at letting go of mementos, keepsakes and STUFF in general.

Suffice to say the house is in worse shape than when I started and there are miles to go before I sleep (or before the Thanksgiving famjam). But the weekend ended on a high note with an impromptu turkey dinner at my Dad and Step-Mom's place.

Shopping. Sloppy. Spontaneous. Familial. That was my weekend in a nutshell.  Now I am going to crank our heat up just a notch or two so I won't see my breath.

Hope yours was good where ever you are, and whatever season you are enjoying!