Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Compassion

The rubber hits the road. Kidlet has a friend who needs help -- she and her adoptive parents have been having problems and they have asked that after she turns sixteen in two weeks, she leave and figure things out on her own. (Keep in mind this is coming from one perspective only ...)

Kidlet wants to save this precious little girl. She is outraged that any parent would disengage from their child and say things so terrible that they could never be taken back. I couldn't help her in the way Kidlet wanted ...

And boy did she let me have it ... my words came flying back at me ...
"When people need help, it's never convenient."
"We have to look after each other in this world."
"You are willing to go all the way to Kenya -- when there's a kid who is all alone who needs help, right here in our neighbourhood."

Kidlet told me that she wasn't accepting it -- that every kid deserves to be wanted and loved, and she would find a way.  The disappointment on her face haunted me all night. I decided that just because I couldn't do exactly what Kidlet has asked, I could figure out how we could collectively offer this girl the help she needs.

My eldest daughter is opening her heart and we are all coming to the table with solutions and options. When I called Kidlet to tell her the news, she started crying on the phone ... saying thank you, thank you. I reminded her that it wasn't a done deal yet ... but she didn't care. She is overwhelmed by the kindness of her sister and relieved by the fact that her friend has options. The first step will be talking to the girl's parents to gage the situation. We want to help - not help tear a family apart.

I am not sure how it will all turn out but I am proud of the determination and compassion shown by all of my girls. Now I just have to follow in their footsteps. That's what I love about being a parent - our children - how they teach us.

2 comments:

  1. DIH,
    A very difficult spot to be thrown into. I have sent you an email with my thoughts - from another mother's perspective (been there / done that, unfortunately..)
    MIH

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi Lyn,

    If there is anyway I can help, count me in.

    Other Shirley

    ReplyDelete

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